WORDS & BRAGS.
I’m not going to lie: this is a place for me to share media and press. I know, I know — sound the Loser Alarm.
winners are grinners!
Shannon’s Kitchen: Healthy Food You’ll Actually F**king Eat was the recipient of two Australian Gourmand awards (for Best Writing and Best Nutrition Cookbook) AND it was internationally recognised as one of the best nutrition cookbooks at the Gourmand World Cookbook Awards in 2019. Yay!
Clearly the judges have exquisite taste.
Ohhhhh, the toddler years: they get a bad rap but they’re actually hilarious. How can one not be amused by these eccentric characters and the classic shenanigans they participate in?
Torquay mum of two and author Shannon Kelly White’s new book Parenting for Legends, has been described as hilarious, brutal, at times disturbing, and the quintessential, tongue-in-cheek guide to life as a new parent.
Shannon is the mother of two boys, she’s written a dreadfully rude (but good) cookbook and now a book for new parents. This week on Babytalk we meet Shannon to talk about Parenting for Legends and the sort of the stuff that no one tells you to expect in those childbirth classes!
Shannon Kelly White shocks with spicy new cookbook
Shannon Kelly White has created this shocking but hilarious cookbook full of healthy, delicious recipes that’s not only sure to get you cooking, but also laughing along the way, in an attempt to turn diet culture – which can be at times pretentious and inaccessible – on its head.
Why Instagram sucks
Ladies’ faces never have moustaches, broken capillaries or croissant crumbs on them. Legs don’t feature varicose veins so thick you could use them as a ski rope, nor do they sport beards that could rival a Clydesdale’s.
Arses (clearly on display with 80 per cent of bikini material happily marooned in bum cracks) never have pimples on them. Nope, those things are smooth, pert and peachy – the sort of bottom that could receive a little smack and not even wobble. Mine has been shaking like a Chihuahua from a spanking I received in 1997 for f**k’s sake.
Wanna read more drivel?
Let’s do it.
Sometimes it occurs to me that if I have to play another round of hide and seek or wheel tiny cars across a goddamn road rug for another minute I might just set myself aflame.
Congratulations on becoming a parent. You will now age at an accelerated rate and there’s a high probability of coming into contact with someone else’s bodily fluids on a daily basis. Well done.