Recipes

How to Nail Golden Roast Potatoes

How to Nail Golden Roast Potatoes

In a quest to become a skinny, dong-juggling bitch I once committed to a low carb diet. Like a sicko, I put pasta in the naughty corner and I turned bread into a social pariah. Eating potatoes? Never. You see, I thought cutting carbs would give me a tight rig and...

Easy Rainbow Birthday Cake

Easy Rainbow Birthday Cake

Herbie turned 4 a couple of weeks ago and the little champ wanted a rainbow cake. Birthday cakes have escalated since the good old Women's Weekly cake days and many children's parties now feature an extravagant custom $200 cake. If you can afford it, good for you! if...

My New Lemon Slice

My New Lemon Slice

Parenthood is a real ride and there have been some surprises for me. I didn’t expect applying sunscreen to a toddler to be more difficult than rubbing lotion on an angry snake. I didn’t expect my nipples to look like sad emojis after breastfeeding. I didn’t expect...

Chicken & Pesto Noodle Salad

Chicken & Pesto Noodle Salad

Being a nurse really takes over your life. For a start, everyone you know asks you for medical advice, ‘Hey, Shannon, I have this cut, do you think it’s infected?’ And sympathy? Gone. You find it really hard to muster compassion for people with a cold after you just...

Chocolate Goo-Goo Cake

Chocolate Goo-Goo Cake

Chocolate cake: it's one of life’s winners. But with a fuckload of sugar, flour and oil, it's not exactly the most healthful shit so, if you'd rather take your health risks in the form of binge drinking, fries and pingers, then making your chocolate cake more...

Feeling Like Sh*t Chicken Soup

Feeling Like Sh*t Chicken Soup

Sometimes we get sick and we just bloody want a bloody cuddle from our mums and some goddamn chicken soup. When my second child was born he had to be sliced out. When the surgeon lifted him skyward like Simba from The Lion King, I expected the ‘Circle of Life’ song to...

Easy as F**k Brownies

Easy as F**k Brownies

So, what we have here is pretty much butter and sugar which is why it tastes so goddamn excellent. There’s a time and a place to pull our dicks about nutritious foods but baking brownies is not that time. I was once health focused enough to try a famous blogger’s...

Honey & Nut Bars

Honey & Nut Bars

I used to be a morning person. An early riser? Haha, fuck no, but I was fairly cheerful and functional on waking. As a child it meant creeping out of a cosy bed to feed and cuddle my pony, Finn. That little porker didn’t like being made to wait for his chaff and hay,...

My Popular Chicken Satay

My Popular Chicken Satay

‘You can, ah… you can give it a little rub if you like,’ said the dear, weak old man mid bed-bath. He was my patient, I was his nurse. He was talking about his dick, which I was about to wash. I don’t know why old men delude themselves into thinking young nurses have...

Jaffa Zero-Cheese Cheesecake

Jaffa Zero-Cheese Cheesecake

This cheesecake leaves me reminiscing over mine and Mr Shannon’s engagement. The fucker had planned it beautifully. We were holidaying on a gorgeous island, he had a vintage ring, he had champagne, and had arranged for a helicopter ride to a white, sandy beach. But...

Loving these recipes? then check out the books!

 

Nutritious food makes you feel awesome but it can taste like penis. In Shannon’s Kitchen, Shannon Kelly White reveals 60 easy-to-follow recipes for healthy food you’ll actually f**king eat.

Her follow-up cookbook, Shannon Does Dinner (coming March 2020) features 6 weeks of go-to meals and is like no book you’ve ever seen before with its crazy photos and funny stories.

If you’ve had a gutful of diets, detoxes and perfect clean eating types, then these hilarious books are for you — there’s no preachy nonsense or etiquette, just ridiculous tales, tasty food, inappropriate language and zero f**ks given.

 

SHANNON DOES DINNER

 Coming March 2020.

A cookbook like never before.

6 weeks of go-to meals for those with nary a f**k to give.

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