‘You can, ah… you can give it a little rub if you like,’ said the dear, weak old man mid bed-bath. He was my patient, I was his nurse. He was talking about his dick, which I was about to wash. I don’t know why old men delude themselves into thinking young nurses have...
This cheesecake leaves me reminiscing over mine and Mr Shannon’s engagement. The fucker had planned it beautifully. We were holidaying on a gorgeous island, he had a vintage ring, he had champagne, and had arranged for a helicopter ride to a white, sandy beach. But...
There was a time when I viewed my breasts like a set of earrings: they came in a pair, they were decorative and they stayed where I put them. But then I had children and they became a fully functional apparatus, and their role as ornaments became only a side-gig,...
Loving these recipes? then check out the books!
Nutritious food makes you feel awesome but it can taste like penis. In Shannon’s Kitchen, Shannon Kelly White reveals 60 easy-to-follow recipes for healthy food you’ll actually f**king eat.
Her follow-up cookbook, Shannon Does Dinner (coming March 2020) features 6 weeks of go-to meals and is like no book you’ve ever seen before with its crazy photos and funny stories.
If you’ve had a gutful of diets, detoxes and perfect clean eating types, then these hilarious books are for you — there’s no preachy nonsense or etiquette, just ridiculous tales, tasty food, inappropriate language and zero f**ks given.
SHANNON DOES DINNER
Coming March 2020.
A cookbook like never before.
6 weeks of go-to meals for those with nary a f**k to give.
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Instagram doesn’t have to be full of self-important wankbags. Mine is a place of fun, food, happiness, dogs, ridiculousness, silly shit and general fuckery.
No dickheads allowed.